Thursday, July 19, 2007

In Sounds From Way Out: Brethren on the Dirty South

Occasionally we'll weigh in on issues involving people and places we have no real connection to, other than we wanna talk about them.

Today's topic: PacMan Jones & Michael Vick.

Nacho: Smells a little like hypocrisy that Goodell laid down the hammer on PacMan before anything'd gone down in the court of law, and yet is holding out for more info on Vick. Vick's crimes seem a tad more carnal, a little more incomprehensible, and the gut reactions inevitably tend towards the worst case scenarios a little easier. I find I'm thinking more about this whole shebang's impact will have on the NFC South and whether or not Athur Blank regrets shipping out Schaub.

Always had a soft spot for Matt, felt he was the only QB trying to run an offense in Atlanta. This'll either inspire a wonder year for Vick, or he'll be bogged down in so many legal proceedings Joey Harrington will get to have his "Paul Blake" year.

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Either way, the Falcons could end up as bad as the Bucs, which really won't matter cuz the Cats and the Saints are going to be battling for the NFC championship all year.

I can has stripper?

As for PacMan, he does seem to have been given the short shrift with his handling, but it's rather disturbing we had to have Ookie electrocute a dog for us to feel that way. PacMan's gotta be feeling pretty good; his people can spin him as "hey-at-least-I'm-not-Ookie" Man. Obviously his absence really puts a hurtin' on the Titans defensive backfield, but Vince has a few more years before he's got them Super Bowl ready. This is a big hit, but who knows, they're already letting him practice with the team, so your guess is as good as mine.

Brethren: See, I can kinda agree with the Big Brother Goodell. PacMan's been arrested five times and been involved in 10 allegations since he entered the NFL. That's not good for any business trying to build a community-image. Which is not necessarily what the NFL is all about; but it can't be good when the team Pacman play(ed) for lives in Nashvegas. I know folks from the Vegas, and they don't take too kind to them sorts of behavior.

As for Ookie, I mean, pret-tay pret-tay sick. Not giving the Bad Newz a good name. But who are we kidding, Newport News, VA, never had a dece name, let alone a good one. And if the Commish hasn't come down on him so hard yet and wants to live behind the "legal justice" thing, then I suppose I can see why. The whole "hypocripsy" argument is really in-one-ear-out-the-other when it comes with dealing with public figures these days.

Don't have much funny to add, especially because the one buddy I know who has hung out with Ookie -- even played PS2 with him! -- hasn't come forward with any tales of Vick back in the day wrasslin his dogs.

What I can say is I just got back from seeing Demetri Martin at the UCB Theatre SummerStage show in Central Park, and that sir is much funnier than myself, so I'll end with his material (paraphrased if not exactly correct):

"I used to follow sports. But I was disappointed because I was always more interested in seeing the two animals fight than the teams that took their names play. Colts vs. Bears? Yes! Wizards vs. Heat? Sweet! Magic vs. Jazz? I dunno, that sounds a little gay to me."

And the one he ended with:
"I always get frustrated by Asian twins. So you two do look alike?"

-- Nacho Friendly and Brethren


Gridiron Goddess said...

NFC is a two team race, with or without Vick in the picture. Carolina and my man Reggie Bush and the Saints. Bucs--well, USC could easily beat the they even count as a professional team at this point?

Oookie is a sick sick puppy. No pun intended.

Gridiron Goddess said...

er. that's NFC SOUTH is a two team race.

And then you'll be meeting up w my Bears. Again.

Trey said...

Ummm, Brethren, I believe that Newport News has quite the naval base, which isn't something I can say about any city in North Cakalacky. Good day Sir.