Bobcats 114, Celtics 106

Brethren: I didn't watch this game at all -- I live with a die-hard Knick fan and so we watched them lose to The Team That Shall Not Be Named (RIP Seattle) -- but sometimes, something happens that makes you scour the Interwebs looking for all the info you can about a game you couldn't watch. The Bobcats beating the world champion Celtics at home in overtime is one of those games for we Bobcats fans.

Both Nacho and I attended home Bobcats games while in Charlotte for Winter Break '08, and yet we didn't write a post about either game. Nacho saw a win over the Wizards; I went to the loss to the Knicks (I actually went to the Knicks loss in NY back in November too). It's just that it's crunch time for us and we'd like to conserve our energy for the Panthers. But that doesn't mean we don't care about the Bobcats or don't have the same rabid fandom for LB's Cats.

Well, maybe not as much as we do for the Silver Fox's, but after the Cardiac Cats go as far as their merry playoff journey will take them, I have a sneaking suspicion we'll be starting the Bobcats Bandwagon, as this team starts to pick up on Coach Brown's style.

Nacho: Likewise, I wasn't made aware of this epic success until I was informed by my cohort Dugan. I believe his message over iChat was "What does Charlotte think they're gonna prove? They're beating the Celtics in overtime." I immediately clicked back over to the GameCast and kept a watchful eye. My coworkers saw me intermittently ecstatic and worried for my Cats. When they prevailed it was quittin' time and I rode home with a gleam in my eye.

I remember when we lost on a Ray Allen dagger last year and how exhilarated I was. To finally get that W is a small, but significant mountain. Dugan humbled me with a message later that was "Next stop: NBA Finals. The Celtics; not the Bobcats."

I'll take thirteen wins any year of the decade....sigh.

Go Panthers!
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Eli's Coming

Nacho: The Larry Brown era began tonight. Ugh. Bill Simmons doesn't think much of the Cats this year, again. Last year he predicted 25 wins and we got 32, the season before that we got 33. Damnit, we were on the rise!

Then we went and brought in Larry Brown.

The Cleveland LeBrons torched us good in our season opener. I gotta be honest, I'm not expecting us to really advance under the wise tutelage of a man who hates playing young players, and already fucked up our draft. Lets just say I remain an devout Bobcats fan, and I hope Adam Morrison has some sort of reverse Sampson effect and becomes the player he shoulda been, now that he's dropped his locks.

Brethren would probably disagree, but them's the breaks.


Happy Halloween everyone.

Git dat kandy! The Jump

We Write A Sports Blog

Brethren: It's about time to get back on this horse.

I have several topics I want to cover, that I've let stew up inside of me and I'll blame travel to far off places like Minneapolis, Atlantic City, and the District of Columbia for the reason why I haven't written for a while.

Enough of that though: I've got thoughts. I've got a blog. Here we go:

NBA
1. The Finals are here: Game One is in progress; it's close; Boston players are trying to do their best impression of Willis Reed, hobbling out of the locker room in the second half.

I won't go into any full in-depth analysis because there's nothing I can write that hasn't been said. The Cap't'll be along shortly to give us youngins the historical perspective, but I grew up with Michael Jordan, not Magic and Bird. So Lakers/Celtics is that vaguely important piece of history that you know you should know more about, but unless it happened to you then it's just something you know about, not something you experienced. You know, like the The Great Depression.

Avoid lightning bolts and read more NBA thoughts with me, after:


Brethren (cont'd): 2. I tweet'd earlier today how I liked where Rick Bonnell's head is at. I normally do. The Charlotte.com commenters give him a lot shit, he takes it in stride, and does a good job as the only beat writer out there who follows the Bobcats. He also writes a mildly entertaining Sunday column about baseball -- entertaining in that it's probably the only non-AP written MLB story all week that goes into the Charlotte Observer sports section.

This morning, Bonnell threw out the argument that the Bobcats should go after 'Sheed. I love this idea. I love that Sheed calls our new coach, "Pounds," because his initials are LB. I think Sheed and G-Force will instantly become really close, that Okafor can be the Ben Wallace/McDyess character, and our backcourt can mature. I love that the Bobcats would only be taking a one-year risk because Sheed's only got one more year on his contract.

Add 'Sheed without giving up Okafor, G-Force, J-Rich, and RayRay and I think you have to make that trade. Rick, I like where your head's at. Bring Sheed back to the Kakkalak.

Ok, Game One's almost over. I gotta go pay attention to that. We'll back with Panthers stories, some baseball thoughts, and more NBA in the coming days, weeks, months.

Also, Fearless Leader: don't forget about your promise to us and the Panthers preview. Don't you forget.
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The Cerberus of Beauty

Nacho: Ladies and gentlemen, we are the precipice of something bigger than ourselves. Gone are the concerns over production like points, rebounds, assists and whatnot. This year, the Charlotte Bobcats have their sights set on one goal and one goal only: To put together the ugliest team, with the most beautiful hair in NBA history!

Learn the identity of the three-headed beast, after...



It all started when we used the third pick in a (not so) loaded draft to get this adorable punim:

Sitting on a Noxema gold mine!

Morrison's known league-round as the only player to look better as a videogame character.

Then, last year, we signed this bastion of beauty to a nice deal:

Please to be touching the balls for Walter?

And now, for the final piece of the puzzle. The Cavs have a week to match the offer, but they don't really need him, and the Bobcats sure could use him. Let's see whose behind door number three....

Hide your heart girls
The Dirty Varj is comin'

There you have it folks. Christmas comes early to the Herbal Essence folks, and they're no stranger to filming three dudes showering. (NSFW, but hilarious.)

Brethren: Ya know, it's kinda like that old YMCA "bark like a dog" play, where on an in-bounds pass, all four players get on hands and knees and start barking like dogs. Then, as the opposite team stands around befuddled, the closest "dogg" to the hoop stands up, receives the pass, and misses a lay-up.

In our professional case, the Bobcats are putting odd-looking dudes on the court, and surrounding them without talent that is unassumedly good (Gerald Wallace, JRich, Ray Ray, Mek) in hopes that other teams will be distracted by the Mustache, Fabio, and SideShow Bob.

Now, only if we can sign Rik Smits, convince him to grow a mullet, and bring in Kurt Rambis to coach -- wearing goggles -- we'd be truly dominant.
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Buttin' The Dam

Nacho: The last time the NBA played a game, I watched Stone Buddah and the Spurs demolish the Global Icons from a quaint, paradisal place called Jaco, Costa Rica. Those were heady days; when the children Partied Like Rock Stars and George Clooney's band of rapscallions delighted audiences the world over in "Ocean's 13".

Ah, but those days are long gone.

Today's basketball landscape is filled with limitless possibilities. In an age when even the Celtics look like even they might win a game or two, the sky's the limit. All it takes is a little ram-like determination and the NBA world is your oyster.

Lets all climb on Walter Herrmann's back and help move the rubber tree plant that is the NBA, after...


Nacho cont'd: I don't think it's too hyperbolic to say that Bobcats rival Boston in their off-season awesomeness. At least we didn't need a blockbuster trade to deflect attention away from some bad press. See, that's Stern's always been masterful at: deflecting attention. Baseball and football hogging all the press? DRESS CODE/NEW BALL! Fistfight at Madison Square Garden? AI FINALLY GETS TRADED! Ref fixing games? GARNETT TO A FORMERLY HAPLESS FRANCHISE! Stern's good at that kind of thing.

But I'm excited. We've got J Rich and Wallace for a lil while, Jared Dudley's gonna have a bigger impact than most first rounders, and most importantly we've got a man who can dunk a ball while it's on fire:

Walter Herrmann's like a real-life
Arch Rivals player with a hot hand
Brethren: Don't have a lot of time to add much before I head out to a bar to meet a fellow Charlotte sports scene fan to watch the Bobcats-Bucks home opener, but I have a few thoughts:

- Yes, we had to call several bars before finding a place with the NBA League pass and enough TVs to actually put the Bobcats on. It's cool; we're determined like that.

- Nacho and I have an inside man who works for the Bobcats, and we should be getting reports from him every so often this season. We can be like Simmons and "call our friend who knows things from the inside." It'll be cool.

- Now that some power has shifted to the East, people are doubting the Bobcats' chances at making the playoffs. They doubt the frontline. They doubt the ability to overcome injuries. Well, fuck them, is what I say. We have the power of the Hermann and GForce -- they shall take us far.
The Jump

Slippery Slopes: Panthers Sign Kenyatta Walker

Occasionally, we'll read something and get into an iChat conversation where we take a subject and run. We gleefully ride the Slippery Slope.

Today's episode: Panthers signing of Kenyatta Walker

Nacho: David J. Warner, the beat Cats writer at the FanHaus, points out something interesting today about the recent signing of Kenyatta Walker. He purports that the Cats signed Walker for the purpose of firing up Julius Peppers because Walker has a history of sketchy play.

This got the Sports Brethren thinking: how else could this plan of attack be applied to our favorite teams?

Some suggestions:

- Trade for Warren Sapp and switch him to the O-line, so that Kris Jenkins has a chance to clean his soul.

- Have Kerry Collins stand on the sidelines with a sixer of Natty Light (yea, he's keeping it Natural in the Carolinas), drunkenly yelling about how much better he could run the offense.

(Ed. note: Julius & Kenyatta should've been an early 90s R&B group.)

A few more suggestions on this slippery slope, after



- Someone find Rex Chapman to ride the bench next to Adam Morrison, quietly whispering, "Trust me, facial hair can only take you so far..."

Brethren: I too think this idear has legs. Let's see, we could:

- Re-sign practice squad WR Anthony Bright so he can tell Steve Smith how much faster Taye Biddle Diddle is than him. And inform Smith that he punches like a girl. That should go over well.


- Buy out Xerxes from his Persian squad to come play for the Varsity Spartan softball team, to properly motivate Leonidas. That game against the boy-loving Athenians is coming up soon and we can't have Leonidas swinging at first-pitch balls that high and away.


- Hire that linguistic broad from Airplane! to translate Jake's frustrated Cajun rants to Keary Colbert and Dwayne Jarrett. "Hollywood" Ryan Kalil can translate their bewildered Trojan looks for Jake.

- Steal SuperHugo from the Hornets. He belong in Charlotte, dammit.

We welcome your thoughts in the Comments. Care to ride the Slippery Slope? Or a Slip-N-Slide? Both? Me too. Me too.

(hat tip: FanHaus)
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