Showing posts with label Slippery Slopes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Slippery Slopes. Show all posts

Sunday, August 26, 2007

Slippery Slopes: A Modest Proposal


Occasionally, we'll read something and get into an iChat conversation where we take a subject and run. We gleefully ride the Slippery Slope.

Nacho: Today we tackle the "lesser of two evils" du jour: Michael Vick.

The FanHaus pointed out this essay by Lawrence O'Donnell wherein Mr. O'Donnell asks the entirely-too-logical question of "What's So Wrong About Killing Dogs?" It's an interesting notion that reminded me of the work by Johnathan Swift that has the greatest title ever, "A Modest Proposal."

You can't look at the Ookie situation the way O'Donnell does because to do so would be to do so without the empathy and morality that we cherish as Western humans. Jon Stewart does a pretty good job of pointing that out.

So with the Irish sensibility for hyperbole in our veins, lets slide down the slippery slope, after

(UPDATE: MJD's DeBrief takes a similar stance, and hey, we both make a 300 joke, so, y'know, woohoo!)



Other Possible Essays:

"What's So Wrong About Killing Dinosaurs" by T. K. Extinction-Event

"What's So Wrong About Killing Spartans?" by Xerxes

"What's So Wrong About Killing Henchmen" by Topper Harley

On a sidenote, I'd like to highlight the good story coming out of Georgia sports these days: For the second year in a row a team from the Peach state won the Little League World Series. Congratulations! Also, a father of one of the players was interviewed during the game. He quit his job to follow his son's journey throughout the Series, and Erin Andrews reported he had had some job offers for after the game. Hooray human interest stories!

Our 46th best state beat the Japanese.


The Jump

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Slippery Slopes: Panthers Sign Kenyatta Walker


Occasionally, we'll read something and get into an iChat conversation where we take a subject and run. We gleefully ride the Slippery Slope.

Today's episode: Panthers signing of Kenyatta Walker

Nacho: David J. Warner, the beat Cats writer at the FanHaus, points out something interesting today about the recent signing of Kenyatta Walker. He purports that the Cats signed Walker for the purpose of firing up Julius Peppers because Walker has a history of sketchy play.

This got the Sports Brethren thinking: how else could this plan of attack be applied to our favorite teams?

Some suggestions:

- Trade for Warren Sapp and switch him to the O-line, so that Kris Jenkins has a chance to clean his soul.

- Have Kerry Collins stand on the sidelines with a sixer of Natty Light (yea, he's keeping it Natural in the Carolinas), drunkenly yelling about how much better he could run the offense.

(Ed. note: Julius & Kenyatta should've been an early 90s R&B group.)

A few more suggestions on this slippery slope, after



- Someone find Rex Chapman to ride the bench next to Adam Morrison, quietly whispering, "Trust me, facial hair can only take you so far..."

Brethren: I too think this idear has legs. Let's see, we could:

- Re-sign practice squad WR Anthony Bright so he can tell Steve Smith how much faster Taye Biddle Diddle is than him. And inform Smith that he punches like a girl. That should go over well.


- Buy out Xerxes from his Persian squad to come play for the Varsity Spartan softball team, to properly motivate Leonidas. That game against the boy-loving Athenians is coming up soon and we can't have Leonidas swinging at first-pitch balls that high and away.


- Hire that linguistic broad from Airplane! to translate Jake's frustrated Cajun rants to Keary Colbert and Dwayne Jarrett. "Hollywood" Ryan Kalil can translate their bewildered Trojan looks for Jake.

- Steal SuperHugo from the Hornets. He belong in Charlotte, dammit.

We welcome your thoughts in the Comments. Care to ride the Slippery Slope? Or a Slip-N-Slide? Both? Me too. Me too.

(hat tip: FanHaus)
The Jump