The MLB & Charlotte

Brethren: The hard-working fellers at Walk Off Walk swung the Interweb's ADHD attention today to the town that the Sports Brethren call home: Charlotte, NC. The reason? They see the QC as the most viable place for Major League Baseball to add an expansion team (along with Portland), to get the League to a nice round number of 32 teams.

Now, Nacho will get to the more hilarious side of this thing (that's his job) and probably show how adorably named this Charlotte MLB team could be named or talk about how not even this would make him become interested on a day-to-day basis in MLB.

I'm here to put the more pragmatic spin on this here idea. And alls I have to say is, "Ha. Ha."

While the boys at W.O.W. have as good as reasoning as any (the SouthEast is underrepresented in the MLB and the QC, while not a huge metropolis, is centrally located for lots of mid-sized areas), I'm not buying that as sole logic. First off, I'm not buying that MLB needs another two teams. I don't at all see how that's good for baseball. I understand the league is making more money, but I think a reinvestment strategy is better than using that cash to try to add out more teams. Baseball has a litany of problems it can address with their extra profits: bad PR from steroids, under-representation from the African-American community, spotlights only ever being shone on the New York teams and Boston, to name three. Methinks there are other ways to spend these newfound dollars.

More reasons why this is laughable and Nacho's thoughts, desde:


Brethren (cont'd): If we allow ourselves the notion that MLB will expand, let's then look at Charlotte as the number one destination. This is a town that is captivated by cars turning left, so one would think that ability to pay attention to the same thing (over and over again) would lend itself well to the baseball season. There's one problem: NASCAR fans are NASCAR fans because they've been raised that way and ain't no Yankee coming down to take that away from them. Being given a team as if we're supposed to be honored to have one? Let's just say them boys wouldn't take too kind to that notion.

More importantly, no one under the age of 35 is passionate about baseball in Charlotte. Lax has become the cool spring sport and young kids have been conditioned to think they have to focus on one sport to get ahead, and baseball sure ain't winning that game against basketball, football, lax, and yes, maybe, even soccer.

Having young, interested fans is crucial in bringing out the masses -- and I can almost guarantee Charlotte can't do that. I went to my first game of the 2008 season last night, attending Shea Stadium to see the Expos, err, Nationals play the Mets. The great booming metropolis that is New York City could not even come close to half-filling (the massive) Shea Stadium, with a division rival in town. This clearly won't be true for the weekend series against the Yankees, but it points out that even in the biggest of places, Tuesday night baseball just ain't all that popular. A team in Charlotte would only magnify that. Hell, look at our Bobcats attendance, and North Carolina is a helluva fine basketball state.

Finally, and let me be clear about this one: this is a selfish reason. But I am very convinced that Minor League Basbeball could kick ass in Charlotte. In fact, I see myself as the guy who, after building up some credibility in the marketing/advertising world here in NYC (and in the sports world with this here blog), returns home to his beloved hometown as the Knight in Shining Armor and resurrects the Charlotte Knights, building the model Triple-A baseball team. A downtown stadium. Enough Minor League Enterprise promotions to fill a schedule. Cheap beers and college nights. I have a vision -- a vision that is only going to be killed by a failing real MLB franchise.

So one of the few baseball fans born and bred in Charlotte has this to say to MLB expansion: Thanks, but no thanks.

Nacho: If you've made it this far, you probably don't have to be told what that giant, rashed anus is doing attached to this post, but I'll tell you anyway. It's the Gaffney Peach Butt and it's the landmark by which you know you're close to Knight Stadium somewhere outside Charlotte. I don't wanna do research for this, I wanna go off feelings, so I, not unlike Brethren, will be dishing the *truly* informed thoughts:

I'm with Brethren on this one, the Charlotte Soccer Moms wouldn't be able to contend for ten years, kinda like the Devil Rays. There'd be marginal interest in the game to begin with because baseball's only enjoyable in person, and even then, it's not a good idea to take an ADD/ADHD kid.

Besides, Brethren's right: Charlotte's an awesome place for Minor League ball, with it's penchant for whimsical "theme" nights and family/drunk-centric appeal. I could see a load of bankers descend upon a new Knight stadium for dollar dog night a lot more than I could see us fiscally supporting any sort of "serious" team. I don't want baseball to be taken so seriously, it's what makes Charlotte not Atlanta, and if there's anything Charlotte strives more, it's to not be called the New Atlanta. Let baseball spiral down the drain as it inevitably will, and let it do so without involving the Charlotte Wombats. Give us more time to focus on the important things, like the vinegar/tomato base argument for barbeque.
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The Sports Brethren Weigh In

Brethren: I woke up this morning to a great phone call from JLew and with no memory of how I got to my bed. I recanted with JWho, then I hit the Interwebs. It was a pretty normal Saturday morning; only I haven't had a normal Saturday morning in quite some time, due to travel, awesomeness, and general debauchery.

Then I, as I do nearly everyday, went to the Charlotte Observer Sports Section online. In a week that sparked great debate over the value of blogs (like this one!), mainstream sports media, the heated fight over what some people don't comprehend, and all that is good in the world, I bring this up because I greatly enjoyed what the newspaper brung me this morning.

Four Panthers articles. To borrow from one of the interweb blogging pioneers: Fuck. and. yes.

Delhomme's arm is feeling great? He threw 34 passes? Fuck. and. yes. Thank you, Scott Fowler.

Stewart's toe is still in a boot? But he talks like a Panther and "looks like a man"? You're God-damn right. Thank you, Charles Chandler.

Moose is happy, looking great, and handling his business? Awesome. Thank you, Stan Olson.

Pep's lining up in Rucker's old position? But just for a few snaps? Okay. Thanks, David Scott.

You see, I love the Panthers. I'm a fan. I write (not frequently) with my brother on this here Interwebs site not because we're dedicated to speed or to ruining society, as Buzz Bissinger would generalize, but because our experience is a shared experience, and we're funnier and better than you.

Our written words back that up, if you'll follow us:

Brethren (cont'd): As I said, I woke up this morning and it felt like a normal Saturday. A normal Saturday to me means the Panthers are playing tomorrow. And it's not so much that it's normal (because it only happens 16 out of the 52 weeks) but that it's fucking awesome. Part of loving the NFL is loving the anticipation of a Sunday. Today, I got that feeling.

How? By reading a newspaper -- online. That's all I needed -- that's all the NFL needs to do and I'm right back in. Four articles. Written by four guys that may or may not share Buzz Bissinger's thoughts and hate this here blog. They may understand that blogging is just another way to approach sports -- and yes, blogs are taking away readership from newspapers, but we aren't taking away readership from Journalism -- and I honestly hope they do.

But I don't know what they think -- and honestly, don't really care. Because we're not stopping and because fuck you. I love the Panthers and I have a forum. I'm drinking the Kool-Aid, as the Cap't asked me last night if I was. I am. It's May, the Panthers don't play a real game for another 4-5 months, and I'm in. I'm in because I read a newspaper (online) today.

So in all honesty, thanks newspaper dudes. I see your value. Just don't be a douchebag about it.

In other news: how about them fucking Atlanta Hawks!? I generally don't like Atlanta as a city -- it thinks it's better than Charlotte because it's bigger and they randomly had the Olympics and the Braves are so bicurious -- but I have to respect the way the bandwagon fans are helping the cause with their NBA team. That's an inspired team, and I love that the fans are a part of that inspiration. Forcing Game 7 like that last night was fucking awesome -- this is a crazy, insane, young team that doesn't care that they don't have Chris Paul or Deron Williams and are just rocking and rolling. Good for them.

(And yes, the headline is misleading, because Nacho's not weighing in, but he will -- you have to forgive him, he's headed to the biggest Renaissance Fair in the US today. Yet another reason we're funnier and better than you.)
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We Hired Some Coach (plus NBA Playoffs and late NFL Draft thoughts)

Brethren: The Fearless Leader is calling out us Bobcats blogs for not being "a-twitter" and posting quickly enough about the hiring of Larry Brown as the third coach in Bobcats franchise history. Well, first off, I'd like to direct Mr. Leitch again to our sub-slogan. Then, I'd like to look at the Larry Brown hire without rash emotion -- like Nacho would like to probably do -- and truly see, is the right move?

There's no denying Larry will be the best tactical and motivational coach to date for the Bobcats. He's the best coach to come through Charlotte (besides maybe Bob McKillop). And while he's known for dramatic turnarounds of franchises, he's also notoriously hard on young teams. He's also known for butting heads with any strong-willed front office executive.

How do we see this playing out? Follow us through...

Brethren (cont'd):, I understand all the arguments against hiring Larry Brown. I can see how his style can be grating on young players and his desire to jettison any player if a few little things go wrong can be undermining to the front office. His recent work with a team like the Knicks was horrific -- and are we certain the Bobcats are much more talented or more cohesive than that team? He's had past failure with Emeka Okafor (the US Olympic team). He's not going to like Adam Morrison's inability to play defense (or his hippie long hair). His tough love on point guards might fall on deaf ears with Ray Ray.

But there are definitely things that I can see going well. I think our stars, G-Force and JRich, will respond to someone with as much respect and past success as Brown. I can see Larry taking a liking to Jared Dudley (yes, I'm ignoring the "Larry Brown doesn't play young guys" corrolary because Dudley plays much older and wiser and tougher than a second year player). And you know what? We are in Tar Heel country: maybe casual fans will come around if we can get some early success.

It's a bold move to recognize that the coach you hired last summer was over his head. It was bold to bring in such a big personality of a head coach. But bold moves are what this team needs. We're coming into year 5 of this franchise and results need to start coming in -- and bringing results is what Larry Brown has a history of doing.

NBA Playoff Thoughts:
- I hate Hack-a-Shaq. Especially when the Spurs are ahead by so much. And when Shaq is 50 feet away from the basket.
- I hate that the Spurs whine at every call. Every fucking call.
- I hate the Spurs.

NFL Draft Thoughts:
Boy, Foxy and Hurney are certainly going all-in. Mortgaging next year's draft to acquire the last blue chip offensive tackle to go along with the big bruising back that Fox/Hurney crave -- that move screams, fuck it, let's win now, cuz if we don't, we won't be around anyway.

I like our draft class right now -- but so does everyone, right? Well, this offseason certainly seems on paper to be the exact kind of offseason Fox/Hurney always plan on doing: beefing up the interior offensive line, acquiring a battering ram running back, signing some options at WR to take some heat off of the tenacious Steve Smith, drafting for value in the second and third rounds, getting rid of high-priced veterans and players who don't want to be in Carolina. All in all, it seems good on paper.

And what seems good on paper will only get better as spring turns to the long summer without football. Guys will look great in shorts and no pads in mini-camps. I will of course be incredibly optimistic come August.

Fuck yea, Panthers.

Nacho: Grumble grumble grumble Larry Browns hates young people apples & oranges apples & oranges Our team is pretty much comprised of young people yada yada yada This team was going to get the 5 more wins they needed to make the playoffs next year, regardless of LB.

Panther draft
+10 me, for miraculously finding myself in a Chevy's restaurant at the exact moment the draft started. Margaritas and no audio make this Bloomberg TV layout motif awesome.

I'm still a little confused with the Jon Stewart pick, but, as usual, the Cats made their splash in the later rounds. Good on 'em.

NBA Playoffs
Go Hawks! Go Sixers! Begrudging respect for the Lakers!

Bake some frownies for the two teams that didn't stay the course when the Lakers signed Gasol: you deserved better, Suns and Mavs. Well, Suns, at least.

AVERY JOHNSON FIRED. EDDIE GRIFFIN OSCAR CHANCES PLUMMET...OR NOW HAVE THEIR 2ND ACT?!
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[Insert Daily Show Joke Here]

Nacho: Far be it from me to call a pick wasted, but the selection of Jonathan Stewart with the thirteenth pick seems unwise. Of all the problems we're about to have this season (porous O-line, flaccid D-line) it made too much sense to pick a big guy with some real longevity potential and bring in someone to motivate DeAngelo Williams to run faster. Surely with that second 1st round pick they'd take someone with a long, tenured experience on the line.

Whoops.

Instead, we took the guy from Nigeria who started playing ball for all of four years. He's probably been through more "real life" shit than any other Panther, but will he know how to pick up a blitz?

Brethren, be like Tanier on Deadspin and sell me on these picks. Also, celebrate the departure of Sam Vincent.

(Ed: WEST COAST JAWS ATTACK!!!)

Brethren's drunk at an antiquated sporting event in the middle of nowhere, Virginia. He'll post eventually.

I'm all for Sam Vincent's departure, but keep Larry Brown away from this team. It's comprised of a bunch of developing, young talent: the one segment of the NBA population that Larry Brown notoriously despises. We need someone who will foster an environment that will continue to let Jared Dudley and the rest expand their potential while making sure J Rich and Gerald are kept happy.
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CP3 and NBA Playoffs: The Conundrum of A Former Hornets/Current Bobcats Fan

Brethren: Watching the New Orleans Hornets and Chris Paul absolutely own the Dallas Mavericks toys with my emotions. On one hand, the brand of basketball Chris Paul plays is amazing -- he's so strong for a guard his size, he has the ability to lull you to sleep then switch gears, he's confident, he's always aware of the court. Quite simply, he's everything you'd want out of your point guard.

On the other hand, I'm a Bobcats fan -- been with them through their inception, they have my full support. However, I feel like how someone in a second marriage must feel: there's no denying I had a first love, a first marriage, and a nasty divorce. The Hornets were my starter marriage of professional sports teams.

I loved them. I loved going to games at the Hive, listening to Steve Martin in the car or on my clock radio in my room, watching them on WJNZ. So many memories, many memories I have sufficiently suppressed, especially when I hang out and root for the Bobcats. I try to forget that I ever had such a passionate, deep relationship with the Hornets.

But, as the Big Cat says, "I'm gonna go see Dr. Finklestein and I'm gonna tell him we have a whole new bag of issues. We can forget about mom for a while" -- the sight of Chris Paul's near-perfect basketball in that vaguely familiar Hornets jersey and hearing the New Orleans Arena blasting "Shout!" as the Hornets built a 30-point third quarter lead, well, it made the emotions of that starter marriage all come flooding back.

Theraputic sessions, desde


Brethren: Chris Paul broke Muggsy's assists-for-a-playoff-game record toinght en route to a 32 points, 17 assists, 5 boards, 3 steals line. That's just an absurd line. And don't get me wrong, I'm not comparing Chris Paul to any Hornet player -- I don't think anyone I watched could have posted a line like that when I was a fan. Le Baron might have posted it -- but it wouldn't have been expected at all. With CP3, a line like that can be expected.

So it's not so much that Paul reminds me of a certain Hornet or a certain time when I was a Hornets fan. Because when I was around, the Charlotte Hornets won lots of games, built solid teams, and won a few playoffs series. But they were never a 2 seed with such a deadly line-up and a player who was seriously considered for the MVP award.

But that's also what gets me: I put in 14 years of Hornets fandom. And aside from that jackass Shinn, it was awesome. I loved it. And we did have good teams with great players to watch. But we never had a Chris Paul.

CP3 is taking the Hornets places. And I guess it's just sad to think how easily the Hornets could still be in Charlotte, and how I could be engulfed in all this.

At least the Bobcats bring in a steady paycheck. Oh wait, they're deadbeat too? I thought second marriages were supposed to be better...

Nacho: While I'm not going through the existential crisis Brethren is, that's probably because I'm more Jason Alexander (Britney's first husband, not Constanza) in that I'm the fan folks forget. I had some magical times at the Hive. I witnessed Alonzo's buzzer beater against the Celts. I remember SuperHugo. I even went to a monster truck rally at the Charlotte Colesium.

But I'd lost all interest a few years before they left. There's about four years there where I just kind of fell off the sports map. Strange how one, steroid-infused Super Bowl season can bring you right back into the fold. So now, I view the Hornets as someone who once dated the Hornets and is genuinely happy for their success, while mutter about how much a loser they're dating now.

Still, the best joke I've heard about the playoffs so far was, I think, from Basketbawlful: the Hornets have banned billionaires from their locker room. Good on 'em.
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Due Kudos - NBA Playoffs

Nacho: A quick note or two on the split-screen adverts for the NBA Playoffs:

1. Good on ya, NBA. Inventive, visually off-putting, and best of all, we get to see which NBA stars can't sit still to save their lives. The Kobe/Shaq split is the most telling. One can surmise that Shaq has acted in major motion pictures before and is as still as the doldrums of the Carribbean. Kobe's head bobs and bounces, as do most of the players'.

2. J. E. Skeets is doing some phenomenal mock-ups over at Yahoo. My favorite, of course, involves Walter Herrmann, although the Varajeo/Ginobli one is worth a gander.

I think my favorite part of these playoffs is going to be the announcing teams. Over the past season I've become enamored with the local broadcast duos for the Clippers and the Lakers. The Lakers is polished and professional, as one would expect, with the occassional exercising of poor judgement. The Clippers tandem of Ralph Lawler and Michael Smith is real gem. Lawler's been calling Clips game since the Carter administration and will randomly blurt out things that totally embarrass Mr. Smith. Lets just say basketball season has added a level of awesomeness since I moved to LA.

Additional playoff ramblings, after...

Nacho cont'd: Everyone's, correctly, discounting the Eastern Conference and expecting whomever wins the West to plow on into Championship lane. However, if you think logically about it, doesn't the disparity of the East bode well for the Finals chances? Isn't it more likely Boston or Detroit (or my pick, Cleveland) will roll through their series' with little resistance, and get some downtime to rest up while the West turns into a bloodbath?

The NBA playoffs are also where I truly hope Hubie and Jeff Van Gundy bring their A games. All season Hubie spouts nonsense and turns phrases that make me furrow my brow. Meanwhile, Van Gundy comes off as a pompous ass for three-and-a-half quarters of every game, but will point out the ONE THING that decides a game before the players even know it's gonna happen. I have a begrudging respect for Mr. Van Gundy and hope he never goes back to coaching.

Also: this commercial is the TITS!



Brethren, what say you?

Brethren: I say...these playoffs are gonna kick ass. Just like this sport's commercials kick ass. Some thoughts:

Spurs vs. Suns: already given us a ridicului double OT game. This series will most likely go to seven games, and even then, we'll feel cheated. I heard this is the first time two 55-win+ teams played each other in the first round -- which should tell you enough about the Western Conference this year.

Hornets vs. Mavericks: Chris Paul is absurd. And by Leitch's logic, Nacho and I should be Hornets fans still to this day -- so I'm happy to jump on that bandwagon. And I wore a Charlotte Hornets shirt to the gym today, and got asked if I was from Charlotte, which was cool.

Lakers vs. Nuggets: Nugs will give the Lakers fits. Listen to me. Or don't.

Celtics vs. anyone: despite the fact that I wanted to vomit at Simmons's article about the MVP race and how it was painstakingly obvious he was going to pick KG as the obvious winner, I think that team is really good. I don't like it when I don't like Simmons' writing because I don't want to be categorized as Simmons sports blogging hater -- but while KG is a nice story, the Celtics played in the Leastern Conference, and he has 2 other All-Stars playing with him! That said, I can easily see them winning the championship.

The Hawks: they're in the playoffs! hahahaha!

As you can see, I'm writing a lot, ignoring the fact that I could be linking to a lot more articles that are evidence that the NBA Playoffs are going to rock, and I'm just plain giddy. I do love this game. And its commercials.
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Sailing Through the Doldrums

Nacho: Well we seem to have gotten through the doldrums. The SportsBrethren don't much follow, or care, about baseball, so expect a slimmer output for a bit. The NFL schedule came out today. MJD thinks the Panthers only Monday Night game has a high potential to be shitty. I think our Cats could be clinching the Division title around that time.

The Panthers will open their season in San Diego, and I will most certainly be attending. There's also a game in Oakland, which may or may not be attended by yours truly.

Other than that, not much doin'. The Bobcats finished their season in much the same manner they've done lately. That's, like, the third game we've blown huge leads in, with differing, albeit frustrating results. I'm glad we won more games than Simmons thought we'd win (25). I look forward to who we might pick up in the offseason, where Mek ends up, and of course, the draft.

Brethren will add some thoughts, and we'll check back in when something strikes us.

Brethren: It feels good to be back here at the Dexter Lake Club.

So while I disagree with Nacho and will remind our good readers, I do care about baseball, it's only April, and I'm hindered by my lack of gumption for one team (an issue I'm sure I'll get into one of these days).

That said, there wasn't much of a Masters and like Nacho pointed out, the Bobcats are following their formulaic late March/early April baloncesto of blowing large leads, letting the other team outrebound them, and generally not seeming too care much at all what Sam Vincent has to say. Whether Jordan fires his good friend after one year is sure to be a topic of interest this offseason.

A quick look at the Panthers schedule just makes me sad football's so far away. I love the idear of caring about the order of their schedule on a Tuesday in April, but not so much that I'm gonna get real riled up about it. As for the NFL Draft, I'm liking most of the names I'm hearing: Jeff Otah or Rynn Clady at tackle, Gator Derrick Harvey at DE, and Rashard Mendenhall at RB (although the last time the Panthers took a Rashard in the first round, George Siefert was at the helm, and I'm sure no one wants any memory of those times).

But at the end of the day, the NFL Draft falls on the same day as the Foxfield Races every year. And for those of you who don't know what Foxfield is, well, I feel bad. Because you haven't lived in super happy eternal awesomeness land until you've experienced Foxfield.

That's about all I have to say about that. Be on the look out for a special guest column from an old pal sometime soon!
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